Uh-oh, Be Careful of What you Wish For!

So last week was hell. Hell in the fact that if my head wasn't attached, I probably would've left it somewhere.  It was good in that I might possibly have some new career opportunities on the horizon. For quite some time now I have been eager to be more productive in my professional life. I am extremely grateful to have been able to stay at home with the boys, but I tell you what, going to work is MUCH, MUCH easier. 

When you go to work you can call it your own. You get a lunch break(all by yourself if you choose), private bathroom breaks, weekends, holidays and vacations. Why don't stay at home moms get that? This all sounds so glorious but on my two days last week that I spent 8-5 at 'the office', I missed my boys. Not only that, when I got home I didn't go for a run. How could I leave when I haven't seen my babies ALL day? I would miss them even more and the guilt would be too much.

So now I have to reevaluate. What do I really want to do with my life professionally? Well, everything! I want to teach cycle classes, continue my Fitneighbor business, increase my knowledge in triathlon coaching and become a certified Crossfit Coach. Is that too much? What triathlon has taught me is that the variety in cross training is what keeps it interesting for me. I want to carry that over into my career. In one day of work, I want to take people through gut wrenching workouts and meet with clients to discuss their triathlon goals. I want to teach a cycle class and then design workouts to challenge my boot campers. I also want to have time to educate myself in all of these areas. Finally, I want the time to challenge my own body, whether it is to become stronger or to be able to run farther, I need to walk the walk.

So last week I had an Endurance Coach training through Lifetime Fitness. I was the triathlon coach last year at Eagan and enjoyed every minute of it. My clients had great seasons and that was very rewarding. While I definitely helped all my participants, I feel that I could definitely benefit from some additional training. Lifetime has given me this great opportunity to work with Troy Jacobson (the Spinervals dude) to do just that. Here is where my professional life my take on a more productive turn. 

Part of me is ready to put the boys in full day childcare a couple of days per week so that I can pursue my endeavors. Then the guilt begins to build. Everyone is always telling me that they are only small just once and I shouldn't miss a beat. And here lies the other issue....I don't have to work. Believe me, some days I wish I had to, that would make this decision a no brainer!  SO, not sure how to close this post.....your thoughts? Parents of older children.....do you wish you would've had more time? Happy you worked? Readers without children feel free to respond!